St. Patty's Day in the Twilight Zone

St. Patty's day isn't really celebrated here, so at around 4pm my girl Carrie and I downed a bottle of Malibu and Orangina on the sunny fields of her highschool. It was just like sophmore year. Sitting there drunk as skunks we complained about how French men are so strange. I hadn't heard from my French "boyfriend" in a few days and my vibes were telling me something was awry. At dusk we headed to the one Irish bar in town, which is in fact not Irish at all except in decor, and proceeded to drink even more. 10pm rolled around and I was ready to retire so me and my roomies started heading home. As we approached the highschool where I live a male figure came out of the shadows. Who was it other than my elusive French Amour! He said that he saw me walking on the street and stopped to talk to me. I sent my roommates ahead and as soon as they were out of ear shot the stupid bastard broke up with me!! I am amazed to report that "the talk" is the same no matter where you are. Such lines as, 'it's not you it's me,' 'I think that you are great but...' and 'I am just really messed up in my head' were all used. It must be programmed into the male chromosome or something.

All of the sudden we heard sirens coming up quickly from around the corner. Frenchie said that the cops were coming and almost immediately a small car came racing into the roundabout with a cop car hot on it's tail. Swerving at high speeds around the corner the fugitive car smashed into an oncoming vehicle. Then the cop car rear-ended the fugitive car! Out of the passenger door sprung out a young arab miscreant who came dashing in our direction with a cop on his heals. Frenchie tried to stand in front of me as some sort of chivilrous gesture, but I pushed him to the side. There was no way I was going to miss the most exciting thing to happen in Romans in the past 7 months cuz he wants to feel like my 'protector.' The young fugitive juked right, then left and in from of the kebab shop the cop lurched forward and pinned the punk to the sidewalk. A minute later another cop car had shown up and they dragged him away. Everyone got in their cars and drove off, and once again the street was empty except for me and the Frenchie.

"So you still want to end things with me?"
"Yes. I adore you...blah blah blah... I don't want to hurt you..."
"Right..."
I just kinda zoned out at what he was saying as I knew the words before he even spoke them. I reacted with a numb smile on my face as I soaked in the bizarro-land happenings. An air of resignation passed over me and gave way to a spring in my step. I shrugged my shoulders, gave a laugh, and wished him a good night. It would have never worked out anyway, but I am definitely cool about the experience. If he never broke up with me on the street that night then I would have missed the only episode of Cops-Romans, and that my friends was priceless. Hands down the weirdest day in Romans.

Bad boys bad boys, watcha gonna do?